MY LIFE

I have been having sleepless nights recently cos I have been having my cough again and feeliong breathless. Sometimes pain at chest area too. I know this time there is something not right although my last check was ok. But I am not going for any surgery cos it is very painful and it will cost a bomb. The insurance company has already put in papers that they will not pay for any illness that has something to do with diabetics. And also, how many more years do they guarantee after the surgery. I DO NOT want to live that long anyway cos if I am sickly, I will bring alot of inconvenience to my family.

My children seem to be able to take care of themselves. They do not heed my advise anymore. And I think I am begining to be a naggy. I often remind my eldest girl to keep her room tidy, come home early and contribute some help around the house. Each time she cooks something, she will mess up the kitchen. My second one will help to clean up the house as and when she is in the mood and when she does, she will be complaining about her eldest sister. But she fail to realise that she also leave her things around sometimes which result in an arguement most times and me getting frustrated and upset at the same time. And my son, he is in the food line and uses my kitchen often. Each time he cooks, I will get very very upset cos, he will leave it in a massive mess. I get so upset that I could not breath. I even cried out of frustration. He will clean the pots and pans but not properly leaving smell of butter/some sauce cooked with cheese or stew lamb WHICH I DREAD. He will leave bits of veggie/cream and even bread crumbs in the fridge. Plates and glasses used are not properly placed back into the cupboards AND SO ON AND ON AND ON.

Their dad often leave our toilet bowl and the basin dirty. I have to clean it cos I cannot stand it. He will leave the cups all over the kitchen table, his diaries/newspapers everywhere in the hall. He has got about 4 - 5 office bags all over the hall. Oh yes, I do keep them in place once in a while but I got fed-up with it cos the place will look tidy but only for 2 weeks max. Everybody knows how to take towels and bed sheets from my cupboard but never know how to put it back. The 2 girls will NEVER fold the clean laundry. It is mostly done by their father or me and sometimes the brother.

My mistake is, I do everything for them when they were small and when I was much younger. And I had a maid for 2 years. I am not that old now but it is my heart which cannot take all these. When I wash the toilet, I could hardly breath afterwards. Or even when I squat to take a pot or pick some onions or wash the table cloth I feel so tired and breathless. I feel so useless. It is so frustrating when I compare what I can do now and before. I could rearrange the whole house furniture by myself in a day but now, I could not even change my own bedsheet. Sometimes I have to beg or get angry for my sheets to be changed.

The good thing about my children is they are not involved in drugs. That is the only consolation. They always feel that I am domineering. I feel that if I don't tell them, I am not doing my duty but when I tell, they feel I nag too much. The thing is: when I say one time, they NEVER listen. Well, I always say this, probably they will appreciate what I have done and said to them when I am gone.

This may just be a coincidence. I have dreaming about the dead quite often these days. Probably I will meet them soon. My mom died at about the same age as I am now. I am not afraid to go cos I have a lot of friends up there too.

AWAY FROM HOME

It is almost 4 months since I have been away from home. I am glad that I manage to visit some places. Spend all my money but at least I get to see some friends. Go back home - have to eat porridge every day. Luckily Wen gave me some pocket money for babysitting.

Today Wen and I did some packing. I came with 2 bags and going home with 5 bags and shipping a big box of mine and baby's old clothings. Bought a lot of clothings for myself and my family and some souveniours for my friends. And I also bought a buggy wheelchair. Sound absurb but I bought it for several reasons. First of all, we might not have the buggy type in Malaysia, secondly, I am the youngest in the family and there are other older brothers, sisters, sis-in-laws and bros-in-laws. As age catches up, a lot of uninvited friends will come finding us. So I think it will come in handy. And most importantly, my legs are failing me. Each time I walk fast or a slight twist, it hurts a lot. So tell me if I am wrong to purchase the wheelchair for future use.

Got two astonishing news just couple of weeks ago. My ex-colleague, very sweet young lady, just had a baby told me that she is getting a divorce. And another of my close friend who is married for the past 30 years, had 3 beautiful kids. Eldest girl - 28, just had a 9 lbs baby, Second boy - 26 and the youngest being only11, broke the news to me that her hubby is involved with a 22 year old china girl. He told her that he cannot leave the woman because she was a virgin before he slept with her. Has given my friend an alternative to either let him keep her or divorce him. Up to date, I still do not believe that he would do such a stupid thing because he adores his kids. I am still praying that he is doing this for a special reason. I know my friend is going thru hell and I regret not being there for her when she needed me most.

These few months have made me realise true love. Well, I must say that it has indeed made me a smarter person.

Sure am looking forward to go home. Especially the food is still the best in Malaysia.

I always say this prayer. May the GOD ALMIGHTY / GODDESS OF MERCY / ALLAH bless and keep harmony in the world.

Trip to Chicago

So nice of my godson's parents (Lyn and Seng) to arrange to take me to Chicago. At first I was worried of the long journey by coach cos my legs will swell but the parents kept assuring me that they will stop every 2 hours for us to go for a pee and stretch ourselves. Tickets all booked and paid............no turning back.

Took Lyn days to finish buying and packing the stuff for the trip. The food items are more than our luggage. There were fruits, cakes, sweets, peanuts, kuachi, biscuits, 20 boxes of cup mee and 3 tubs of 5 lit water. But it was smart thinking and worth in spite of all the carrying off and on the bus.

Been in NY the whole week, there was no rain but on the morning of our trip, it rained. So we had to call for a cab. Good thing cos 3 of us had to carry about 7 bags (big and small) excluding our handbags. And carrying it up the subway station is no joke....errrrr for me. Altho both of them are ever so nice to hand me the lightest of the whole lot.

When I first went into the bus, I slipped and hit my leg against the foot rest. It was very painful (imagine my bone against the steel bar) and a pc of flesh actually came off. I only get to put a plaster after I reach the hotel.

I sat in the middle section of the bus and the bus stinks with urine smell. Obviously I was not the only one who smell it. I sounded to the tourist guide, John and he said that he would do something about it. Anyway, he did not get rid of the smell and I suppose we all got use to the smell after a while.

The journey started of with John telling us where we will stop to pee and stretch. I was not able to understand him properly cos he could not speak english well. So for two hours, there was complete silence in the bus where most of us were sleeping cos we woke up really early. Our first stop was 'The Frog City' . We all had to line up, switch off all out mobile phones to pass through the security check at the entrance. When I went in I thought we were going into a court house. Then John show us a picture of a big frog on the floor. It was made of tiles and guarded by a lady guard. That was what we all lined up through strict security for.

I am glad we went by coach otherwise we will not be able to see all the towns in between New York and Chicago. I remembered Ohio, Detriot, Cleveland, Illinois, Indiana, Toledo, Pittsburgh, Michigan. Might have miss some in between cos I was sleeping most of the way. Went to Holland and German Village too. Went to see Henry Ford Museum - Vintage Cars Exhibit. Beautiful. All the old vehicles - from bicycles to planes. Then we went to see the new porch cars. Oh! and Christmas Wonderland in Frankenmuth..............my goodness the place is soooooooooooooo big and they sell only x'mas decorative items and there must be trillions of them. We were there for about and hour but I hardly had enough time to go through 3 rows of the deco items. Sad to say tho, 99% of the things are made in China.

Went for a cruise just round and round the same spot and had dinner on board. I only had salad cos most of the food is not to my liking. ( I do not take lamb or steak or anything cooked in cheese). Had lunch in china town in Chicago. The best lunch or meal for the whole trip ......... well for me. Most of the lunches are either Macdonald or Kfc. We were told that we'd probably have that again for dinner so while at china town, we bought some roast duck and ribs. Stoped by a rest area for dinner and we had ours in the park. Then when we reach the hotel, we had cup mee.

The best place we went was a park in Chicago. There was a large group of people there doing exercises and we all followed including John. It was fun.

On the way back there was more fun in the coach cos we all started telling jokes and singing songs. We were all more relaxed with each other and all of us were having so much fun. I think that should be the way to start the journey. But then everybody was so shy. The journey back seem so much shorter.

On the whole, I am glad I went for the trip. Tks again to Lyn and Seng ko.

Rain

Went to The Big Apple (New York) for 2 weeks to visit my godson Jason and family. Not very familiar with the parents. Just had a few dinners with them for the past few years. The whole family are very hospitable. Will elaborate more in my next post. Must tell this joke before I forget.

Jason's parents took me for a trip by bus to Chicago. It wud have been a very long and boring trip if he did not sit next to me and tell me jokes. And this is one of them.

He told me when he first came to the states about 20 years ago, he went to china town and it was raining. He heard a chinese woman shouting - 'Ti Li Ta La' - Ti LiTa La'. He thought that she was shouting to everyone that it is raining but as he approach nearer to her, he noticed that she had a lot of umbrellas with her and still shouting 'Ti Li Ta La' - Ti Li Ta La'. He stood there for a while and still wondering why she is shouting those words. AND found out later when someone went to buy am unbrella and paid the woman - THREE DOLLARS.

New/Future Home

Today I got a surprise from my daughter. She told me that my husband has bought me a new home or shall I say a future home.

I have got mixed feelings over this. Don't know how to explain it but it sure spoils my day as I will be thinking about it all the time.

He has bought a place for eternal rest at the Shah Alam area. It is not cheap cost RM25k each. Don't know if this is planning for us or for the sake of the kids?

UL just told me not to think about my age and I was telling myself to let go and feel young and so on but how la when u get some news like this? Kinda depressing. Sigh!!!!!!!!!!!

Greetings from New York

Hello! greetings from New York. Reached JPK airport on the 30.7.08 at 10.30am, an hour early. My godson's parents came to pick me and we went by train and got lost cos the particular train do not go to the station they came from. I think we went off and on the train for about an hour. It was their first time by train too. So I decided to ask and finally got the correct train. What a joke!!!

There is 3 steep flight of stairs to reach the streets. When I reach the top I was already breathless. Had to stop a little while. We finally got back to their home on the 3rd floor. The weather was so unkind to me. It was sooooooo hot. I felt to sticky cos there was totally no air at all.

Lyn, godson's mom cook and we had dinner at 4.00pm cos they were thinking of taking me to some nice night spots. With the heat and my swollen leg, I just did not feel like going out at all. So we did not go out but just chit chat at home.

I fell asleep while waiting for my godson to come home. He came back at almost 12.00am after his shower, he came to my bedside and talk to me. He was very tired too but he refuse to go back to bed. Anyway, I had to chase him out cos I was very tired myself.

I really slept like a baby and Thank God they had the aircon on. They have the whole family planning to take me to places and shopping. Will tell more soon.

Visit to the Orchard/Farm

Been here in London for 2 months and went twice to my favourite spot - the Orchard/Farm. It is my fourth visit. My first two visits were the most memorable ones.

First trip - about 5 -6 of us, we took a train there. I picked a lot of strawberries, blueberries and a little of raspberries and one apple (cos not in season). Walked around the farm joking and had so much fun and found many other vegetables like potatoes, carrots, huge bourgettes, cauliflowers, cabbage and brocolli. I was the oldest there but the most childish when it comes to picking fruits. They keep calling out 'Aunty Penny look here - taking photos' I just told them.you all go ahead, I am very busy..... hahahahaha!!!! Then comes the highlight of the day. We looked, searched and asked everyone/everywhere and OMG there was no toilet. The only toilet available is the one at the shops before you come into the farm. We were somewhere in the middle of the farm. So the boys went behind the raspberries plants, and the younger ladies says they are fine and me......oh gosh I need a pee. Looking around frantically, arrrhhhh! I saw a huge pile of twigs. So I told Wendy, I am going to pee behind the pile of twigs, you 'watch water' for me.
As you know, when you have waited for a long time, it takes you ages to finish doing it. Still at it for a couple of seconds cos it went like long and short then long and short................ still at it WHEN I HEARD THE SOUND OF A TRACTOR COMING THIS WAY. Oh! no, not coming to collect this pile. I wanted to pull up my pants but cannot it has not finish yet and not like tap can turn off......... just didn't know what to do but pray lor. Thank GOD, they did not come for the twigs. After this incident, I never dare to keep my pee for long long time and never dare to do it in the open.

Second trip - Wendy hired a car and five of us ladies only drove there. We ate a lot of strawberries, corn and sugar plums. Was so fasinated cos we had to squat down to pick the sugar plums cos they were all at the tree trunks orhanging down from the branches. We actually had to crawl under the tree to reach those fruits. It was so beautiful and amazing and that is one of the reasons why I keep yearning to come back to london for visit.

The farm closes at six, the crazy ladies decided to drive 2 hours to Brighton for a bowl of curry noodles. By the time we reached home it was almost 2am.

One thing good was for the first 2 trips, we started he journey very early so it was not so hot and we get to spend more time looking around for other fruits and vegetables.

Besides coming to see the little sweetheart and taking care of Wendy during her confinement, I wanted very much to pick cherries. I was still not well by May so I prayed very hard and took all kinds of medications to get well and fit for the journey. I was still a little breathless but I dare not complain cos when and if I do, my family will not let me come as I was travelling alone on the long flight. Praise the LORD, I made it.

Unfortunately this time around, I find it totally different. No more umph!!!!!! Ok, perhaps it is just me. Like my daughter said, everything is just me, me and me. Perhaps I am just over reacting/sensitive whatever. First of all this time we went with different groups. Secondly, Wendy must have gone a hundred times thus lost interest and moreover there is BB to feed and sleep and so on. And thirdly, we went there so late.


This time, the first trip went with Wendy, BB, Wendy's sister in law and son, the weather threatens to rain, so BB and Wen had to stay in the car. Only manage to pick some strawberries and raspberries. Cherries is only available two weeks later. We were in the farm probably for about an hour then went to the shops for another half hour.

Second trip went with Wendy, Jon and BB too. It was so hot Wen and BB had to stay in the car with the air con on. Spend less than 1 hour there. Only harvested 3 cauliflowers, some sweet peas and 2 miseerable potatoes. Cherries were not available anymore. SSSSSSSSsssssoooooooooooooo disappointed.

The only cheeries I get to pick was the few that Pearly purposely left for me from her cherry tree and the ones I stole from a neighbour. According to Pearly, well at least you have picked some. Hahahahaha!! Good thots Tks Pearly.

Nevertheless, I must say thank you to Wendy and Jon for the time and effort. Thanks.

Old Age

Old age comes with forgetfulness, clumsiness, uselessness, brainless, strenghless and breathless.

I am only 53 yrs old and I already encounter all those mentioned above. I used to be very systematic and energetic in my house work when my kids were young. We were staying in a single storey house when I only had my two girls, before my son came.
First thing I do when i get up is to take whatever I want to cook out from the fridge, then rinse the clothings already prewashed the night before. And next, sweep the floor, then hang up the clothings and after sending them off to school, I will mop the floor or manage to change all the furnitures from the hall to the second hall or from the first room to the back room when I am bored with the settings. Then I will put the soup to boil and season pork/chicken or fish and cut the vegetables and place them back into the fridge. Everyday, I wud prepare different menu for lunch for my kids. There were chicken chop, scramble egg on toast, fried rice, soup noodles, fish and chips, fried wanton with ikan bilis soup and sometimes just milo with cornflakes. I am done by noon. Then start to prepare dinner at 5.30pm.

Where have all those energy gone?????? I hate myself for being so useless. Not that I wanted to be forgetful or something like that but it really hurts when you are shouted at or screamed at the slightest mistake you make.

So far, I have only seen one man who is very filial and patience with his parents. His name is David. His mom is sickly and he is the only one to take care of her in spite of having 3 other siblings. She is one difficult lady. In one day, she can demand to be send to the doc 5 times. Even in the wee mornings. The poor chap will do it. And he will conspire with the doc to say that all is ok. He will feed her with so much love while she, having lost her sense of taste will throw tantrums. This is a daily affair. He took care of her for years before she is called home. His dad is still around at he age of 80+. He is staying in another town and the cute part is the old man will not eat until he hears the son's voice. So he makes it a point to call his dad daily no matter how busy he is.

I don't wish to be like his mom (sickly and dependant) BUT I DO WISH TO HAVE CHILDREN LIKE HIM

Like everyone else, wish I can turn back the clock and do justice to myself. Not that something bad has happened but then I just wish to be wiser.

How I wish.......................

At this very moment, staying in the room of my niece's father-in-law' flat, feeling very hungry and do not feel like going out to the kitchen to find a bite, (got up at 8am and it is already 11.10am) how I wish that I have enough money to sponsor my niece to get an apartment of her own. Yes, my niece bought me a lot of biscuits and other stuff, but if u have to eat that daily, it sucks. Oh that makes me miss all those, chee cheong fun, mee yoke, char kuey teow, curry mee, nasi lemak or even a simple char kuey wit coffee back home.

Staying in a stranger's house is really torturous. Not that he is not nice, but each time we do something, you know that there is a watchful eye which makes me VERY UNCOMFORTABLE so I opt to wait for my niece to have breakfast/brunch together.

If I have plenty of ££££ then I can pay for her operation to remove her gallstones and then I can go HOME and maybe come again to see the little sweetheart. She is so cute really. At 6 weeks she already knows how to 'ang ku ku'. I love it when she laughs heartily in her sleep and when she does that, she is such a beauty. But she has been spoilt in a way by many people around. She is used to being carried so now we have a little problem with that. She wants to be cuddled all the time.

Anyway, since I have travelled to many hundreds thousands of miles, I might as well move around a bit to other places cos i don't know when I am coming this way again. So nice to have some relatives/friends around. Planning to go to Leicestershire, Holland, Germany and New York.

So how I wish..................................... (I KNOW EVERYBODY DOES TOO) have plenty of $$$$$$$$$$$$$$.

Mis-communications

I bought some fruits (apples, bananas and oranges) from Sainsbury cos I need fruits after taking so many types of medications. When I saw the fruits I wanted to buy many many more types cos it is so cheap......... I mean dollar to dollar. £1++ for a bag of 8 nice sweet crunchy green apples and 5 big navel oranges. 5 Bananas is less than $1/- .

In all the supermarts, I noticed that they only sell one type of bananas that is Montel. I was explaining to Jon's family (sister/bro-in-law and dad) that in our country, there are so many kinds. We have pisang:- emas, raja, susu and berangan and those big big ones where they make kuih kodoh (sp) and the green ones used for making goreng pisang besides raja. They were surprised there were actually so many kinds.

Then after taking the bananas for a couple of days, I noticed I had alot of wind and keeps on farting which is so embarrassing. So I stopped eating. Jon's dad saw the balance and asked why I did not finished it. I told him that after taking the 'kong chiew' (banana in cantonese) I felt my tummy bloated with wind. Then he said, it happens becos u eat 'kong chiew' (male banana) - u should eat 'na chiew' (female banana). To my surprise, I exclaimed - eh! u have a different kind here too. He also claim that it is very good for diabetics. Then I said - ok , the next time u see those, u buy some for me to try. So, the very next day, he went out early and bought 4 huge pcs back which only cost $1/- He told me that these are specials ones and sold by the africans. When I saw it I thought eh! it looks like the ones they make kuih kodoh. Anyway I have to try it to show my appreciation since he is so nice to go all the way to the wet market to buy for me and keep repeating that it is good for diabetics.

I took one and cut it into half to share with him cos I said it was too big for me. He refuse to eat saying that he is not a diabetic and I end up eating the whole thing. Altho it has turned yellow, it still has the raw kind of taste. but I ate it all anyway. Does not nice lor. Then I said - oh! so the 'na chiew' is like that one arrrrrh! He just smile saying that maybe it is till not ripe enough. Ok, I shall wait till it is a bit soft.

Then on Beatrix's full moon, Jon's eldest brother and family came. The SIL prepared dinner while I just stayed in the room to tend to BB. During dinner, I noticed that 2 of the 'na chiew' was missing. So I asked - oh! someone has eaten it. Then the SIL said, no, I fried it. And showed me the balance. I took one and I said it definitely taste better after being fried. Then she started laughing and said that of course - this type of bananas have to be fried. NOBODY eats it raw.........then, the father laughed till he almost got chocked when I told them that the father purposely went to buy this 'na chiew' for me.

So naive of me, taken for a ride.

I can communicate with Jon's dad but then his hakka slang is terrible. One morning he was making ' kau yuk' (steam pork with some veg and herbs) . I heard 'kow yuk' (dog meat). Then I asked, huh! u eat 'kow yuk' one arrrrh! First time he said --- ya. Then I asked again, really arrrrh! u eat 'kow yuk' ?????? He roared into laughter and said NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT IS 'KAU YUK' ................................... There is plenty more of these mis-communications. I must say, it irritates him at times but it makes his day most times.

In London

I arrived in London on 27.5.08 at about 4.08 as scheduled but by the time I check out, it was almost 5.15pm. Jon came to fetch me. Took about an hour to reach his home. Traffic was ok compared to our traffic back home at that particular hour. Altho the roads were narrow the traffic flows very smoothly cos all the cars follow their lanes unlike M'sia where some suka suka cut lanes.

Finally able to see the little sweetheart with big big eyes. So adorable. She is one person who lives up to the name:- a hungry girl is an angry girl. Nothing and no one can stop her cries except the bottle or her mummy's tits. She sure knows her rights. hehehehehehe!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am totally lost in other people's house. Don't know where their things are kept. Can't find sesame oil, cornflour, tomatoe sauce and used the salt they use to wash veg for soup. Cooking for Wendy is no problem cos she eats anything whether nice or not. But I also have to cook for her father-in-law. Considered him very nice to accomodate me and Jan n baby who was here a month earlier. BUT when it comes to food he is sooooooooooo fussy. He does not eat chicken any other style except fried or roast. Does not take eggs, ginger, prawns, shrimps and even pork. Nor does he takes spicy food. I feel very bad if and when he takes only a bowl of rice cos his nornal intake is two bowls. He practically eats only the vegetables and he ALWAYS buy two types only. So the lunch or dinner is always the same. Anyway, I have tried my best to cook to suit him cos we are staying in his home. His freezer is always full with chicken drumsticks and wings, pork and ribs. But there are not much spices around. Well I can understand cos he is a Vietnanmese. His food is totally different from ours (m'sians). He does not cook while I am around (so far) except did roast chicken drumsticks 2xs but he did most of the marketing. {Oops!! just found out that he is NOT a Vietnamese. He moved from China to Vietnam but he is 100% chinese}

One thing I must salute to him is that he is very tidy and clean. Water for drinking and boiling soup must be double filtered and preboiled and all plates and chopsticks/spoons must be rinsed in boiling water before use.

As I get up quite early, normally I wud prepare the ingredients for lunch and dinner and place them back in the fridge and then I have time to laze around for a bit while waiting for the princess and her parents to get up. When she does, I will help get the bottles sterilized while her mom attend to her needs.

This weekend will be the full moon. Both Wendy and I are just waiting to go shopping a bit and of course not forgetting my visit to the orchard. I pray I am able to harvest cherries (my dream). Initially when I shop for some groceries at Sainsbury's, things were so cheap. Most items that I bought were less than £3.00. The total came to about £14.00 - three bags full BUT when converted to RM it is RM90.00. Went to china town with Jon and bought a durian. It cost £16.00 and that is almost RM100.00 . They say that durian is good for confinement woman so I bought for Wendy but that after eating, she had a bad attack of gallstones. Poor child. Was sent to hospital by ambulance. NO DURIANS FROM NOW TILL SHE HAVE IT REMOVED.

Counting the days for my visit to the orchard.

Lost yet another friend.

This is also sudden and unacceptable. My dear friend Allan Kuek is murdered.

We form a group when we were elected as committee members of my club in Subang. Initially there were just 7 of us. Namely:- Henry , YS Lee, Steven, Dom, Robert, Allan and myself. Then some close friends decided to join in so now we have 13. Additionals are: Wendy, Francis, Vincent, Lee Pang and Kathy. We celebrates each others birthday and have a gala time. We will eat good food, sing and dance and not missing out drinks too. We are about 8 yrs old already.

I feel good about it as I think that out of the billions of people, God brought us together.

Then Dom left us for Dubai but then we will try to meet up whenever he comes back. Ya, we miss him but then we cannot just think of ourselves, he has to give the best to his family so he choose to work where they offer better.

Allan is a very gentleman. Basically a quiet guy. He never disturb the girls during party. Good dancer - so all night long he has to go round dancing with all his dancing group of ladies. Best part of him is he always has his limits in drinking. When he has had enough, he will sit quietly at a corner and start drinking plain water. Also a very caring person. When I sms to inform them that I am not able to go to UK cos I had another bad attack of cough, He was so concern, he quickly called and asked if I am alright cos he mistook that I have a heart attack. YS confirmed saying that he is also very helpful in many ways. And he is one guy always with a smiling face. Oh! I can go on and on and on about him but the important thing to do now is:- try to do justice for his uncalled for death.

Allan's case was sad cos he did not go on his free will. They abducted him and kill to silence him.

He went for drinks with 2 other friends at Hyatt Saujana, they called it RP. After the drinks and dance, all left for home but only he did not reach his home. 10 days later he was found floating down the Kuala Selangor River. They must have thrown him into the river for many many days cos his body was badly decomposed. His wife Catherine cud hardly reconized any part of him except for the old fashion brief he was wearing. "Mo tuen tuen" his 3 kids (youngest being 6 only) became fatherless. And Catherine is not working.

Don't you think that this is a brutal act? YS suggest that we bring up this issue, Hope the press and the new leaders will help to curb this. So if there is anyone out there who can help in any way, please do keep in touch with me. Thank you.

SENSITIVE ISSUES

Most agree including myself that this is a free blog where u can put in anything that comes into your mind BUT I must remind that there are some sensitive issues that must not be done just like I told my daughter Pam. I won't scold her in her blog and create a scene like some people. Behind closed doors, we can scold/shout/scream at each other but in our open blog, I see no reason why we should mislead other bloggers cos we are not detailed in what we write.

And thus it is not fair for the other bloggers to post any comments base on just one side story. When and if I want to write a post, surely I would write all the flowery and best things that I have done. Who would tell what has been swept under the carpets. As a matter of fact, it is the family members or the people involved who is clear about the whole picture. Some people tends to elaborates a great deal in what they do for people but some choose to stay quiet about it (until maybe cannot tahan la). But when that happens, which I call the no turning point then things will turns sour especially when half the world knows but........................... half the story.

That is why I said, always leave some room for amendments. Yes I too will get very pissed off if someone tries to bully my family esp. parents but then, when we react, we must think of the consequences. First we do not bark blindly cos too many people will be hurt in the process. Aim at the target and bark or bite. Sad to say, there are some people who are just too stubborn and won't listen. Trouble is when they think they are wrong, nobody is right. And when they think they are right, everybody is wrong.

I still can't believe that one silly post can cause or stir up such an unfriendly situation or is it the comments from other bloggers which adds salt and pepper to the wound??????????? This is something all the bloggers need to think about as and when you post comments on other blogs. Please do not touch on sensitive issues.

BLOGGING

I wonder what blogging is all about? I thought it is a place where you can say/view what is in your mind and for others to read and help find solutions/ or make friends but recently I found some squabbles.

It is not necessary, if you think you don't like what the writer writes, then don't read his or her blog. What is written may be misinterpretted.

Funny Familiar Forgotten Feelings

Each time I fall ill, I have those FFFF (Funny Familiar Forgotten Feelings) and that is the yearn for my mom. Somehow, she will know what medication to give and cure me almost instantly. She has the look of a matron but never was in medical line at all.

I have been quite sick last year and thot that it is all over but the cough attack came back again. All those cough tablet and phlegm medication did not stop it. Went to see a physician in Ipoh yesterday and he thinks it cud be due to the failure of my heart. It scares me a little cos he cud be right as I have an abnormal heart which only function at 40 - 60%.

Why I have FFFF?? Cos I was coughing the whole night in spite of an aid to sleep and 2 times of cough mixtures, I just cud not sleep but cough and cough and keep throwing out the phlegm. NONE of my family members noticed nor came to ask if I needed anything.

It is so different the things a mom do for her kids and what the kids do for the mom. When my kids are not well, I will fetch them water and medication and check on them everynow and then. And when I was coughing and throwing out and so on, I simply miss my Mom and wished she cud/wud help me but of course she is not able to even if she wanted to.

This morning when I woke up, my eldest and youngest already disappeared from the house without knowing even if I am dead or alive. The father continue to do his theraphy in spite of Saturday which he normally don't go. Luckily number 2 is around. She knows I was very sick cos we went to Ipoh together and she slept in the same bedroom with me and also went to the doc with me. She know how serious my condition is. I am sure she wud have told the rest of the family, but it hardly make any difference to some. Oh! yes they care............... but with they mouth only. Base on their disappearance from the house you already know the answer.

I am sure I am not the only mom who feels like this. Sometimes we just don't know how to let out so like most times, we just keep quiet and let the matter pass but honestly, it hurts. I only can cry, Cry for my mom. I know I am too old for that but I simply miss her.

2007......GLAD IT IS GONE.

What a year it is for me. Besides loosing my job, having to go thru an operation, being in and out of hospitals and clinics, I lost a dear uncle and his daughter (who is supposedly my half sister - my father's daughter given to my mom's sister) and a very close friend.

Well there were marriages too. My sister's son got married but within 3 months, the DIL refuse to let the MIL to stay with them. Wants to put her in the old folks home. I don't know it this is going to happen. So far, my house is her sanctuary. At the moment she is still staying with me. Hope they will work something out.

Luckily there is a great news to console and make back for those bad times. My big girl Wen has finally got married and now having a baby. And Jan has a cute son. So I naik pangkat again besides the 3 from Pearly.

Glad that the new yr has set in and I am slowly but surely getting better.

Pray that 2008 will bring loads and loads of health, joy, luck and peace to the world.