Saturday, April 5, 2008

Funny Familiar Forgotten Feelings

Each time I fall ill, I have those FFFF (Funny Familiar Forgotten Feelings) and that is the yearn for my mom. Somehow, she will know what medication to give and cure me almost instantly. She has the look of a matron but never was in medical line at all.
I have been quite sick last year and thot that it is all over but the cough attack came back again. All those cough tablet and phlegm medication did not stop it. Went to see a physician in Ipoh yesterday and he thinks it cud be due to the failure of my heart. It scares me a little cos he cud be right as I have an abnormal heart which only function at 40 - 60%.
Why I have FFFF?? Cos I was coughing the whole night in spite of an aid to sleep and 2 times of cough mixtures, I just cud not sleep but cough and cough and keep throwing out the phlegm. NONE of my family members noticed nor came to ask if I needed anything.
It is so different the things a mom do for her kids and what the kids do for the mom. When my kids are not well, I will fetch them water and medication and check on them everynow and then. And when I was coughing and throwing out and so on, I simply miss my Mom and wished she cud/wud help me but of course she is not able to even if she wanted to.
This morning when I woke up, my eldest and youngest already disappeared from the house without knowing even if I am dead or alive. The father continue to do his theraphy in spite of Saturday which he normally don't go. Luckily number 2 is around. She knows I was very sick cos we went to Ipoh together and she slept in the same bedroom with me and also went to the doc with me. She know how serious my condition is. I am sure she wud have told the rest of the family, but it hardly make any difference to some. Oh! yes they care............... but with they mouth only. Base on their disappearance from the house you already know the answer.
I am sure I am not the only mom who feels like this. Sometimes we just don't know how to let out so like most times, we just keep quiet and let the matter pass but honestly, it hurts. I only can cry, Cry for my mom. I know I am too old for that but I simply miss her.

3 comments:

rainbow angeles said...

oh dear auntie penny.. i hope u'll get well soon.. maybe u can take warm water when u coughing? it helps to sooth the throat.. or maybe pop a lozenge or two? it also helps a lot.. there's this one brand of lozenge which will kind of 'numb' the throat but for the life of me, i can't remember the name! can get it in the pharmacy counter... i need to check wt my mom abt the brand.. it's also more expensive but helps the throat alot! will ask my mom later, and come back to u again..

meanwhile, Strepsil's menthol lozenge can also help the throat. take care, ok?

rainbow angeles said...

hi, me again.. the lozenge's brand is Difflam.. got red & green colour, i think the red one is stronger.. my mom also said Difflam has got this liquid for gargling.. helps to kill bacteria.. hope this will help sooth your throat and the cough.. take care!

Penny said...

Hi Angeles,
Tks for the info. Yes it is indeed a good medication. I have forgotten completely about it. Will get it tomorrow. Tks again.